Changing My Major


For as long as I can remember, music is and always will be my passion. It’s my first love, and it gets me through some of the toughest times in my young life. I come into Drake my freshman year as a vocal music education and I’m ready to make teaching music my career. The odds are out of my favor.

Announcement photo that I would attend Drake for Music Education

Music ed at ANY university is the hardest major hands down, but I also start college in the fall of 2020; the peak of the plague. Classes are all online, choir is socially distant, and I go through a brutal breakup. Safe to say things weren’t off to the best start.

First Semester

Everyone is still unsure how to navigate a pandemic world when I started at Drake University. Fall semester I went in bright eyed and bushy tailed ready to take on a grueling 18 credit, 10 class course load.

Things went alright for the first few weeks, but during midterms I went through the well-known college experience known as the first heartbreak. This is the start of my downfall.

J-Term

I try to turn the corner on the new year and dive into my school work, but a fresh breakup combined with holing myself up, alone in my room for all of winter break was not a good mix.

I let even the Spirit of Mathematics get away from me.

My final project is on Math and Music

Second Semester

I’m dumped mid-music theory lecture that would introduce the key concept for second semester theory. The composition technique known as Counterpoint is introduced.

No matter how hard I tried and how long I studied I could never grasp the concept until our final composition assignment. I hand in my chorale piece to my professor, shut down my computer, and call it a day.

But my mental health basically plummets during this time in my life, and as a result, my grades follow.

I log into my ear training final with my theory professor to her telling me she had great news, and that I had managed to pass theory.

It feels good to take the small win.

Making the decision

I give music education a full year.

When I weigh my options next to each other, comparatively there’s one right answer. I have to change my major.

The fight with this decision consumes me. If I change my major, then I have to accept that I failed. Failure is a particularly loathsome topic.

I mull it over before telling my voice professor my final decision.

In light of everything I’ve been through, I compromise with myself. I change my major to Digital Media Production and continue to participate in voice lessons with a new professor, and choir. All things considered, I got a good deal.

How it effects me today

Logan right before most recent studio recital

I wont go as far to say this solves my problems. My GPA will never recover from my year in music education and I still work to repair my relationship with music.

I suffer from impostor syndrome. My confidence is nerfed.

I’m learning to love my voice again! My new voice professor Alyssa and my accompanist Cassie are my biggest cheerleaders.

I perform again in my first studio recital!

I don’t know where I want my career to go, but my situation shows that evidently, everyone goes at their own pace.

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